and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Randomize
