Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
Never remove your contact lenses after eating an entire bag of spicy doritos.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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