dude i'm inner monologue high
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
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