Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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