so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
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