he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I'm too high and old for this...
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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