Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize
