R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
