I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
