Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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