found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
why do cheetos always look like penises
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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