HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Randomize
