i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
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