wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
Randomize
