I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
ok, im coming! i just found some lemon square in my bangs, washing that out..this shit is all over me! was i in a pie eating contest?
yes
did i win? did you like my outfit? or should i change, if you were horny would you bang me?
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
