this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
i think i scared a bird with my dick
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
