You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
He used pronouns for his penis while sexting. I don't know what I did to deserve this.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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