What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
Randomize
