hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
Randomize
