He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
