i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize