We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
