He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Randomize
