How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Nothing like all your friends getting engaged to remind you how much fun sleeping around is.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
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