we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
