She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
