Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
