Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
please promise me that no matter what happens you will keep me away from the children
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
Day drunk. He was sitting in the back seat, opened the door, leaned out, and peed right there in the dutch bros drive through. No one even noticed haha
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
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