she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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