Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
where are you?
Hypothermia
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
