i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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