it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Randomize
