oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
