Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
Randomize