Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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