East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Randomize
