She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Randomize
