Your face is a jimmy john
Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Im debating on how to word my craigslist post so i dont get arrested...
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
