We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
