he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
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