Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
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