Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize
