I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
