So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
My brain says no but my pants say off.
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Randomize
