remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
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