i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
My vagina is officially offended.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
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