i barfeds in our rink
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
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