How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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