SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I just want to make out with him forever
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
