no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
